Moving On

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I’m not gonna lie to y’all.  Aunt Mary’s death did a number on me… but not for the reasons you may think.  For starters, her death did not come as a surprise at all, and I had actually told one of my friends that I thought she was going to die on my grandma’s birthday.  However, as you know, no matter how much you know or how prepared you are, you’re still not ever fully ready.  

What bothered me the most about losing my Aunt Mary was that she was the last piece of my grandma I had left.  My grandma was the definition of family to me.  She showed me what it meant to love someone who is not your blood as if they were your blood.  And when Aunt Mary died, it was like that element of my life (being accepted as blood even though I’m not blood) died too.

It was tough.  But you know what I did?  I decided to move on.  That day.  Now granted, I understand the grief process and all of that.  I totally do.  But I elected to just be okay and move on.  I have accepted the fact that I may not ever meet anyone who loves me the way my grandma and Aunt Mary did – people who aren’t my blood but treat me like they are.  And I have to be okay with that.  I have to move on.

Why do I have to move on so quickly?  Because there are people depending on me to arrive on schedule.  If I focus on what I no longer have, I will not arrive on schedule.  I have books to write.  I have podcasts and shows to record.  I have A LOT to do.  I don’t have time to sit around in mourning. It’s not going to change anything.

Now let me clarify a few things.  You SHOULD grieve.  And you SHOULD take the time to go all the way through the grief process.  However, there will be times in your life when you will realize that your best course of action is just to cut your losses and move on – and when you feel THAT WAY, that’s exactly what you should do.  

Aunt Mary is okay.  It is well with her soul, so it is well with mine.  Her death marked the end of an era for me, but I refuse to mourn the era that ended.  Instead, I will celebrate the era that has arrived.  All is well.

Have an amazing day today.  Show love to yourself AND others.  Be GREAT!  I speak life to you and everyone and everything connected to you!  Catch me tomorrow!

XOXO,

Na’Kole ♥